Many people tuned into the Golden Globes this past week, and many more watched parts of the show the following days on social media.
A night that is meant to celebrate the most impactful artistic expressions of 2023 will now be remembered for its attacks on women, namely Taylor Swift and those who worked on the Barbie movie.
This summer was a glorious, beautiful summer for the girls. From Taylor to Beyonce to “Barbie”, women were out in droves. We celebrated life and our femininity and our collective love for each other – and the patriarchy had something to say about it.
It Was Just a Few Jokes. Why Does It Matter?

Being underrepresented in pop culture impacts the way we all view women, regardless of our gender.
Studies have related underrepresentation to low self-esteem, poor confidence, decreased sense of belonging, and fewer overall opportunities throughout life for girls and women.
Jo Koy’s tone deaf monologue told many of us a sneaky message the patriarchy has been selling for ages–
It doesn’t matter what you do. You could break box office records. You could sell out stadiums. You could have a significant impact on the global economy during one glorious summer. And still. You’re just a girl.
It all comes down to “boobies” and boyfriends, according to this man with a microphone.
They’re Burning All the Witches, Even If You Aren’t One

As a society, we love to hate woman and Taylor Swift is a perfect example.
The Grammy award winning global phenomenon Taylor Swift has been in the news a lot lately.
Partially for her sold out world tour. Partially for her ability to change the face of the music industry as she reclaims her music with her Taylor’s Version album rereleases.
Mostly it’s been to complain that she goes to football games in her spare time.
What is most confusing about this discourse is that Taylor is not doing interviews at the games and not engaging in press in any kind of way. She is in a private box, being goofy with Brittany Mahomes, and is being shown having a good time between downs. Yet she’s being charged with “ruining football” by showing up at the games.
Somehow her identity over the past several months has been watered down to “Travis Kelce’s girlfriend”. After all her accomplishments, it all comes down to her having a boyfriend and daring to be publicly happy about it.
What message does this send to women and girls around the globe? To paraphrase Taylor, if she was a man, she’d be the man. We have watched this powerful woman be degraded and dismissed for nearly two decades.
It doesn’t matter about her status, her privilege, her platform. She’s still just a girl.
What Was I Made For?

The Barbie movie took a lot of heat this summer.
What it was: A powerful indictment of the patriarchy and societal expectations of men and women.
What it was: A controversial satirical piece of art that earned billions of dollars in the box office.
What it was: A comedic and heartwarming introduction to feminism that had equal supporters and haters.
What it was not: A movie about a “plastic doll with big boobies”. (The man literally said boobies on live television and then threw a small temper tantrum when no one laughed. I can’t even.)
Taylor Swift once said, “A man is allowed to react. A woman can only overreact.” The reactions of the “Barbie” cast and crew are emblematic of how men and women have been taught to handle disrespect.
Margot Robbie, Barbie herself, sat with a frozen smile. Greta Gerwig, writer and director, America Ferrera and Issa Rae, costars, nodded along, looking uncomfortable.
The only person at the table who looked as angry as we all felt was Ryan Gosling, who brought life to the character Ken.
Even as we are openly mocked and attacked, women must be polite. The only one who had the freedom and the privilege to openly react was the male star of the movie.
The purpose of art is to get us to talk. It creates discourse and conversation to propel us forward. It helps us to look inward and at our society, forcing us to ask ourselves tough questions.
That’s just what the Barbie movie did this summer. Despite being record breaking in more ways than one, in that moment it was diminished to the only thing the patriarchy thinks women are good for – Sex.
“It is literally impossible to be a woman… Like we always have to be extraordinary, but somehow we’re always doing it wrong.” – Gloria, “Barbie”, 2023.
Twice as Good to Go Half as Far

In the first month of being in theatres globally, “Barbie” earned 1.18 BILLION dollars, making Greta Gerwig the first solo female director to earn this honor. “Oppenheimer” brought in 648 million dollars in the same time frame, a little over half of the Barbie movie’s earnings. Yet, for some unknown reason, *cough cough it’s the patriarchy*, “Oppenheimer” is compared to “Barbie” as being more impressive, more important, over all just more. Just ask Jo Koy.
From boy bands (I saw the Jonas Brothers twice this summer) to romance novels (every time Emily Henry releases signed copies of her books, I call everywhere to try to get one) to reality television (don’t get me started on the newest season of “Love Is Blind”), to “Barbie”, women’s interests are constantly belittled by men and society at large. We are mocked for our interests and made to seem less intelligent for the things that bring us joy.
I have a theory on why “Oppenheimer” did not do as well in the box office as “Barbie”. Before I share this theory, please keep in mind that this is a feminist critique of the film. I’m sure there are many people smarter than me who have different opinions on why “Barbie” did so well this summer in comparison to “Oppenheimer”.
My theory – Excluding women from the narrative of a film cuts your viewership in half.
Women played a large part in the war efforts in the 1940s and in the Manhattan Project itself… Not that you would know that if you watched “Oppenheimer”.
In the 1940s, women served our country in and out of uniform as nurses, secretaries, radio operators, scientists, engineers, mathematicians, technicians, and more. Women heavily assisted in the creation of the atom bomb.
In “Countdown 1945” by Chris Wallace, a non-fiction record of the creation of the atomic bomb, Wallace speaks to the importance of women in the Manhattan Project. During the creation of the atom bomb, General Groves, who was played by Matt Damon in the movie “Oppenheimer”, discovered that “the Calutron girls … were more effective at the job [of enriching uranium] than the scientists were” due to the ability to focus on the outcome instead of the process itself.
Women kept the country running while most men were fighting the physical war in Europe. Yet the only women with notable roles in this film were women sleeping with the main character.
In real life, Oppenheimer’s love interests were complex, brilliant, multidimensional people. In this film, they were diminished to sex objects and bad mothers. While men received a complex movie about moral dilemmas and the power you can have as a single person, women were left again without role models or a seat at the table.
I anticipate another movie coming soon. A retelling of the Manhattan Project from women’s perspectives. And I don’t want it.
I don’t want any more women-led versions of movies and television shows created by and for men – “Ocean’s Eight”, “Ghost Busters”, “How I Met Your Father” … I want to be included in the original narrative of the story.
Because we have been here the whole time. Because we have held families and communities and countries together in times of stress and collective trauma. Because we have raised the next generation, and we have fought in wars, and we have served our country.
Because you couldn’t have done any of this without us.
Final Thoughts

Jo Koy’s performance at this year’s Golden Globes was disappointing at best and insulting at worst.
Women deserve not only a seat at the table, but to be appreciated and celebrated when we perform at the highest levels of our industries.
Girls and women receive subtle and not so subtle messages about our place in the world every day, through movies, music, and popular discourse. Without an ounce of shame, Jo Koy let the world know exactly how he views women – As less than, as Other, as an easy punchline.
I am so proud of be part of a generation that is not standing for this treatment any longer. We have taken to social media this week to let everyone know how strong we are and who we will raise our children to be.
If you had a strong reaction to Jo Koy’s Golden Globes monologue, comment below! You are not alone and I would love to hear your thoughts.
Reading Suggestions
Chris Wallace, Countdown 1945: The Extraordinary Story of the Atomic Bomb and the 116 Days That Changed the World (2020). Bestselling non-fiction by former Fox News anchor about the true story of the atomic bomb. Includes women in the original narrative!
Simone De Beauvior, The Second Sex, Women as Other (1949). Non-Fiction essay about the how the patriarchy views women.
Lizzie Page, Daughters of War (2018). Historical Fiction about the importance of women in World War I.
Janet Skeslien Charles, The Paris Library (2021). Historical Fiction about the importance of women in World War II.
Resources
The information provided here is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
If you or someone you know is in crisis, please reach out to the National Suicide and Crisis Hotline at 988 or visit 988lifeline.org.
For longer-term mental health care, you can find therapists in your area on psychologytoday.com.
If you are in Massachusetts and seeking therapeutic services, please fill out the contact form on buildinghopema.com or reach out to me directly at mikaela@buildinghopema.com.
Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, and you don’t have to face challenges alone.


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